What’s the tackiest gift you received last year? Or ever?
Over the years, my family members and I have engaged fiercely in Olympic-level competitive gag-gift-giving.
My mother and I send each other kitsch personalized with names—of people we don’t know. She once sent me his and hers coffee mugs meant for “Dwight” and “Daisy.” In return, I bought her a doggie bowl from our church thrift shop, personalized for “Georgina.” Mom doesn’t have a dog.
My father and I have exchanged nativity scenes and other collectibles constructed of everything from neon-painted seashells to rusty beer caps.
My husband and I have passed the same can of Pepperidge Farm Vichyssoise back and forth for more than 25 years. Not exactly a tacky souvenir, but something neither of us wanted to keep. Obviously.
It’s my turn to re-gift a 32-year-old bourbon decanter in the likeness of the head of John Lennon. I’ve been mulling who in my life deserves such a treasure. So far, no one qualifies.
Those worthy relics notwithstanding, I’m here to announce that we might have a gold medal winner in this Kitchlympic event. You be the judges. Better yet – it’s not too late to submit an entry.
Word Nymph 
I totally qualify for the Lennon head. Just sayin’.
Duly noted. I just had a thought — when I die I might have my ashes put in there (my loved ones could first ’empty’ it of the rotgut bourbon therein, in a ceremonial rite). Imagine.
Monica Welch Sent from my iPhone
Oh, Woman.
But what IS it???
Re: the bourbon dispenser: Pics or it didn’t happen, as they say.
Ms. Mudge, I understand your skepticism and, as soon as I can photograph the relic, I shall post an image. Publicizing this treasure, however, may require me to up my homeowners insurance.
Monica Welch Sent from my iPhone